Authenticity: The Moral Obligation to Follow What Grips Us

Introduction: The Illusion of Conformity

Most people live under the assumption that they are making choices, but in reality, they are being lived by societal expectations. Their opinions, desires, and values are often borrowed, a patchwork of external influences rather than a true expression of self. In this sense, those who conform without questioning do not truly exist as autonomous beings—they are echoes of the collective, not individuals.

But true existence—true being—requires something deeper. It demands authenticity.

And authenticity is not just a preference. It is a moral obligation.

The Cost of Conformity

Society enforces conformity through a subtle but relentless process of conditioning, beginning from childhood. Schools teach obedience over independent thought, rewarding those who follow the rules and discouraging those who challenge authority. The workplace operates the same way—creativity and individuality are tolerated only as long as they don’t disrupt the system.

Social circles, media, and even family expectations reinforce the idea that deviating from the norm is dangerous, often labeling nonconformists as “irresponsible,” “naïve,” or “difficult.” Fear is the primary tool: fear of rejection, fear of failure, fear of instability.

The result is that most people silence their inner voice, shaping themselves into socially acceptable versions of who they might have been. But this safety comes at a cost—the death of individuality, the suppression of what truly grips us, and ultimately, the loss of a meaningful existence.

The Moral Obligation to Follow What Grips Us

Each of us has something that grips us—a pursuit, an idea, a way of being that feels so intrinsically right that to deny it is to deny life itself. Jung called this the process of individuation: becoming who we are meant to be. To ignore this pull is not just a personal tragedy; it is a failure of moral responsibility.

Why? Because when we refuse to actualize ourselves, we contribute to the mediocrity and stagnation of the world. A person who suppresses their individuality out of fear or convenience is not neutral—they are an active force in maintaining the status quo. And the status quo is rarely built on truth; it is built on comfort, on inertia, on the avoidance of suffering.

Society does not want you to be authentic. It wants you to be useful—which often means predictable, obedient, and easily categorized. But your obligation is not to society. Your obligation is to your own highest potential.

Why Conformists Do Not Truly Exist

To exist means to be self-defined, to have an internal center of gravity. But most people derive their sense of self from external validation. They wear masks, adopting identities that are palatable, digestible, socially acceptable.

These people are not truly being—they are reacting. They are constructs shaped by the expectations of others. And because their identity is not rooted in anything real, they live in perpetual insecurity.

This is why inauthentic people become defensive, judgmental, or overly conformist. If they allow themselves to acknowledge even a fraction of their true self, their entire artificial construct might crumble. And so they cling to their illusions, policing themselves and others to maintain the lie.

But deep down, they are haunted by the knowledge that something is missing.

Self-Actualization: The Highest Form of Authenticity

The ultimate goal of existence is not success, wealth, or even happiness—it is self-actualization. To reach this level of being is to integrate all aspects of oneself: the noble and the base, the rational and the instinctive, the conscious and the unconscious.

Carl Jung spoke of the shadow, the dark and repressed parts of the self that we refuse to acknowledge. When we lack authenticity, we fear our shadow. We suppress our doubts, our contradictions, our hidden desires. But this rejection only leads to projection—we start seeing our own darkness in others and lashing out at them instead of confronting ourselves.

The more we reject our own authenticity, the more we become slaves to insecurity, envy, and resentment.

But to integrate the shadow is to reclaim wholeness. It is to accept the full spectrum of what we are and wield it consciously, rather than being unconsciously controlled by it.

The Consequences of Inauthenticity

When we betray our authenticity:

We feel anxious and directionless.
We rely on external validation, which makes us manipulable.
We experience deep existential guilt—the sense that we are wasting our potential.
We become resentful towards those who have the courage to live freely.
We project our inner chaos onto the world, seeking enemies instead of introspection.

By contrast, when we embrace authenticity, we may face suffering, isolation, and uncertainty—but we gain something invaluable: the ability to look in the mirror and know that we exist.

A deeper dive into Authenticity and Comformity

Here’s a deeper expansion on each point you can incorporate into your article on authenticity:

1. The Role of Fear in Conformity

Fear is one of the primary forces that keep people trapped in conformity. From an early age, we are conditioned to seek approval—whether from parents, teachers, or society at large. This approval becomes a form of validation, and the fear of losing it can be paralyzing. People hesitate to express their true thoughts, ambitions, and desires because they worry about judgment, failure, or rejection. This fear-based conformity leads to a kind of existential paralysis, where individuals live not as themselves but as a projection of what they think others want them to be. Over time, this erodes their sense of identity, creating deep-seated anxiety and dissatisfaction.

The paradox is that by avoiding rejection, people end up rejecting themselves. To break free from conformity, one must confront the fear of isolation and recognize that genuine belonging only comes when we are truly seen for who we are.

2. Authenticity vs. Hedonism

A common misconception about authenticity is that it means indulging in whatever we feel like doing in the moment. Some mistake rebellion, impulsivity, or selfishness for being “true to themselves.” But authenticity is not about unfiltered self-expression at all costs—it is about alignment with a deeper truth within.

Carl Jung’s concept of individuation shows that true authenticity requires self-awareness, discipline, and integration of both light and shadow aspects of our psyche. Hedonism, on the other hand, is often just another form of escapism, driven by unconscious desires rather than conscious alignment with one’s values and purpose.

A truly authentic person does not simply “follow their desires” blindly—they follow what grips them, what calls them forward into meaningful challenges. This path is not necessarily easy or pleasurable in the short term, but it is fulfilling in a way that mere indulgence never can be.

3. The Myth of Security in Conformity

One of the greatest illusions that keep people in conformity is the belief that it offers security. People take stable jobs they dislike, stay in relationships that do not nourish them, and suppress their dreams—all for the sake of a perceived sense of safety. Society reinforces this by promoting stability as the highest virtue: a predictable income, a socially acceptable path, and approval from others.

However, this security is an illusion. External circumstances can change at any moment—jobs can be lost, relationships can break down, and social trends can shift. More importantly, when people conform for the sake of security, they often experience an inner decay: they lose touch with their instincts, passions, and individuality.

True security does not come from external validation but from an internal foundation—a strong sense of self, competence, and the courage to navigate uncertainty. The irony is that the people who take the “risky” path of authenticity often develop the most real, lasting security because they learn to trust themselves.

4. Historical and Philosophical Perspectives

Many of history’s greatest thinkers and philosophers have wrestled with the question of authenticity:

• Friedrich Nietzsche spoke of the Übermensch, the self-overcoming individual who creates their own values rather than inheriting them from society. To him, authenticity was about transcending imposed morality and embracing one’s highest potential.

• Carl Jung developed the concept of individuation, the process of integrating all aspects of the psyche—including the shadow—to become a whole and authentic person.

• Søren Kierkegaard warned about the “crowd” and the dangers of living according to public opinion. He argued that true faith and selfhood require a “leap” into the unknown, embracing individuality over societal expectations.

• Jean-Paul Sartre argued that we are “condemned to be free”—meaning we are always responsible for defining ourselves, and inauthenticity is a self-betrayal.

Looking at these perspectives, we see that authenticity has always been an existential challenge, one that requires both courage and self-awareness.

5. The Shadow in Social Conditioning

When society imposes norms, it often does so by repressing parts of human nature that are deemed “undesirable” or “too dangerous.” People learn to suppress their aggression, ambition, or nonconforming thoughts in order to fit in. This repression creates what Carl Jung called the shadow—the unconscious aspects of ourselves that we deny or reject.

However, when people suppress their own shadow, they tend to project it onto others. This is why authentic individuals—those who express themselves freely, take risks, and refuse to conform—are often met with hostility. Their mere existence reminds others of the parts of themselves they have denied.

Instead of integrating their own shadow, the conformists attack those who embody what they themselves secretly wish they had the courage to be. This is why genuine authenticity is often met with resistance, ridicule, or even hatred—it forces others to confront their own inauthenticity.

6. The Relationship Between Authenticity and Creativity

Creativity is one of the purest expressions of authenticity. Whether in art, writing, music, business, or problem-solving, creative individuals draw from their inner world rather than copying external templates. Every great innovator, from Leonardo da Vinci to Steve Jobs, succeeded because they refused to conform and instead followed their own vision.

However, creativity requires risk. Authentic expression often goes against the grain, and many people fear this because it invites criticism. Society tends to reward safe, predictable work while resisting groundbreaking ideas—until they become mainstream.

This is why true creativity is an act of courage. It requires one to trust their inner vision, even in the face of doubt and rejection. Those who dare to create authentically are the ones who shape culture, while those who conform simply follow trends.

7. Practical Steps to Reclaim Authenticity

Becoming more authentic is not just a philosophical idea—it is a process that requires concrete action. Here are some steps to cultivate authenticity in daily life:

• Question Your Beliefs – Identify which values, opinions, and goals are truly yours and which have been imposed by external influences.

• Face Your Shadow – Acknowledge and integrate the parts of yourself that you have suppressed, including your fears, desires, and ambitions.

• Stop Seeking Approval – Recognize that validation from others is a weak foundation for self-worth. Authenticity often comes at the cost of disappointing people.

• Follow What Grips You – Pay attention to what deeply interests or fascinates you. These are clues to your authentic path.

• Take Small Risks – Challenge conformity in small ways first, such as expressing unpopular opinions, changing routines, or pursuing creative projects.

• Develop Inner Security – Build self-trust through competence, resilience, and self-reliance. Authenticity is easier when you know you can handle the consequences.

• Surround Yourself with Authentic People – Seek out those who encourage honesty, growth, and individuality rather than conformity.

The checklist for conformity

Here’s a list of all the things we pretend in life, from childhood to adulthood, to fit into societal expectations rather than follow what truly grips us:

Education

Pretending to care about subjects that don’t interest us – just to pass exams.
Pretending grades define intelligence or worth – when they mostly measure obedience and memory.
Pretending to respect authority figures (teachers, professors) – even when they are uninspiring or incompetent.
Pretending that standardized tests measure real-life ability – instead of just how well we memorize information.
Pretending school prepares us for life – when it mostly teaches us to conform.
Pretending that a degree guarantees success – when most skills needed for success are learned outside of school.

Work & Career

Pretending to be passionate about a job we don’t care about – just to earn a living.
Pretending to respect bosses we dislike – because speaking up could cost us opportunities.
Pretending that working long hours is a virtue – when it often just drains our soul.
Pretending to be busy – because looking busy is valued more than being productive.
Pretending meetings are useful – when most could be replaced with a simple email.
Pretending to like coworkers – when we only tolerate them because we have to.
Pretending that climbing the corporate ladder leads to happiness – when it often leads to stress and emptiness.

Social & Personal Life

Pretending to like small talk – even though it feels meaningless.
Pretending to enjoy social gatherings – just to avoid being labeled antisocial.
Pretending to agree with popular opinions – to avoid confrontation.
Pretending to be happy on social media – when life is actually messy and complicated.
Pretending that relationships are fine – even when they are toxic or unfulfilling.
Pretending to be interested in what others say – just to be polite.
Pretending to like certain music, movies, or fashion trends – just to fit in.

Consumerism & Lifestyle

Pretending to want the latest gadgets, cars, or clothes – even when they don’t add real value to our lives.
Pretending that expensive brands define status – when they often serve as empty signals of wealth.
Pretending to enjoy fancy restaurants, vacations, or luxury goods – just for social validation.
Pretending that buying a house means success – even if it means being stuck in debt for decades.
Pretending that more money always means more happiness – when deep fulfillment comes from meaning, not wealth.

Beliefs & Identity

Pretending to follow religious or cultural traditions – without questioning their meaning.
Pretending to believe in things we don’t – just to avoid judgment or exclusion.
Pretending that political parties represent real change – when most of them maintain the status quo.
Pretending to have life figured out – when deep down, everyone is just improvising.
Pretending that external achievements define success – when true success is internal.

Existential & Psychological

Pretending that we are happy when we are not – because admitting dissatisfaction is uncomfortable.
Pretending that life has a clear purpose – when most people are still searching for meaning.
Pretending that time isn’t running out – even though we waste years on things we don’t care about.
Pretending that we are in control – when so much of life is unpredictable.
Pretending that death is far away – so we don’t have to confront what truly matters.

In short, we pretend at almost every stage of life—to fit in, to feel safe, to avoid conflict, or to maintain illusions. But the cost of pretending is losing our true selves.

Conclusion: The Call to Authenticity

Authenticity is not just a personal preference—it is a moral obligation. To live authentically is to honor the unique potential within oneself, to resist the pressures of conformity, and to fully engage in the process of self-actualization. While society rewards compliance, true fulfillment comes only from aligning one’s life with deep personal truth.

Those who suppress their authenticity in pursuit of security ultimately lose both. Those who embrace it—despite the fear, resistance, and uncertainty—gain not only a stronger sense of self but also the ability to genuinely contribute something unique to the world.

The choice is always ours: to conform and disappear into the background, or to fully exist as the individuals we are meant to be.